I feel as empty as a politician's promise

Day 12 and 105 kilos.

Another 1.5 kilo overnight weight loss also caused by a similar bike ride to the one that I completed the day before. However this bike ride seems to have taken its toll because after I got back to the house and showered I did not feel so good. In fact I felt completely drained. I lay down on the bed to rest at 5pm and the next thing I knew, it was 7pm! But I still felt drained and even the chief noticed when she got back saying that I sounded weak when talking. Probably as a result of my earlier nap, I couldn't fall asleep until past 2am. A major case of racing brain despite the fact that my body was begging for sleep but the end result was that when I awoke this morning I still felt drained. I need to re-charge, so today I will minimize energy expenditure and forego the bicycle ride.

The chief has vigorously denied the fact that our social life revolves around food, I'm still not convinced, however she did raise an excellent point last night - meal times are when you interact with your family. As a result of my current shenanigans we are not therefore sitting down together to eat. Quite the opposite is happening, she will eat in a different room from the one that I'm in to spare me food lust. Although I am now over the food porn stage and she no longer needs to do this, perhaps she has a point when she says that as a result of my fast we're living seperate lives. We no longer have coffee in bed together, we don't sit down to eat our morning porridge and nor do we have dinner together. If I think about it, each of these times are when our communication is at its strongest apart from at the weekends. She is not happy about this and although we are only on day twelve of the proposed forty two, I can see that this could cause a problem in the next few weeks. She understands what I'm doing but does not agree with my methods - she feels that a 1.5 kilos overnight weight loss is dangerous. And I think it bugs her that she is making plans to meet friends for Sunday lunch and that I won't be there. In response, all I can do is point out that this is a temporary and not a permanent situation and that in 30 days or less (if I feel that I am damaging myself) everything will return to normal.

I'm so tired at the moment that this is all I'm going to post today - sorry.